We made it through our first round of high dose treatment. It's good to not have it be an unknown anymore. Chris kept telling me, as I was dreading the first appointment, that it was good the be going on the offensive. I didn't really buy it until we wrapped up -- and then realized that he was right. It did feel good to be doing something that would be actively working to fight this beast off.
I was told to focus on fluids throughout treatment, so I spent the morning loading up. I was ready to float away before I even got to the doctor's office. I'm sure it helps though. I felt pretty good by the time it was over, other than my arm that had the IV was really sore -- and it flat out hurt while the Interferon was going in. I pulled out my meditation app while it was going and it really seemed to help. Who knew? Oddly, I was really craving sushi on our way home -- and called it in. By the time Chris picked it up I was thinking it was probably not going to be the best thing for me to eat. I was able to eat the cooked parts -- and then handed the rest off to him. At that point, I was exhausted. It reminded me of how I felt when I was pregnant. I could not keep my eyes open to save my life...and I just curled up on the chaise while the rest of the family ate dinner. I rallied though -- and that felt good...until I decided to stay up late watching tv with Chris - and then the aches and pains kicked in. I will start going to bed at 9...or at least start taking my evening drugs a lot earlier. I know that all of these side effects are going to accumulate and get worse, but I at least have hope that if I can get through them, I'll be functioning at some point during the day. I have hope. Hope is good.
We wrapped up last week with an evening out with friends. Friends that we haven't seen, in some cases, for years. The stories and the laughs were a wonderful way to wrap up my week pre-treatment. I did have my first taste of how isolating a sickness can be. For me, the evening was a touchstone of happier times and a bit of a celebration before facing a future that is really scary to me. For everyone else - it was just a fun night out with friends. While I loved every minute with this crew, it was the first time that I felt lonely while I was with them. I am so thankful for my support system -- and I credit everyone with keeping me focused on having a positive outlook. But...yeah, at the end of the day, I'm still going to need to find it within myself to come out swinging each and every day.
My parents are back and we are getting into what will be our new routine this month. The girls are loving the added attention - and they did a great job getting all of their homework and chores done before I got home from treatment. May it continue! I think that the first round of our multil-generational lifestyle that we had during my surgery prepared them for this round. They seem to be sticking with their routine and not thinking that all grandparent time is play time and opportunities to see what they can get away with. I love my girls -- but they sure know how to push the envelope when someone else is managing them. Secretly, I'm proud.
Time to guzzle more water and gear up for round two. One down, 163 treatments left to go....
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